Get off the Pot

Are you a pot activist? Are you disgruntled that your letters cannot get any positive feedback from the members of parliament that you send them to? If so, I have some advice for you.

Stop being an idiot.

Yes, you are an idiot.

I know you are an idiot, because you said that the Canadian government was "Cock-Blocking" the weed-needing population of our fair country from their much deserved Mary-Jane.

Let me quote again, "Cock-Blocking."

Not only am I offended that one would dip their pen in the dumbass inkwell to write to their elected representative, I'm offended because the usage of the term is not only unrequired, it's entirely incorrect. The "cock-block" is the action of preventing a male from consumating a relationship with his object of affection. Here is an example of proper usage:

"I cock-blocked Curtis for the entire party because he is a vile and wretched creature who should be prevented from ever having intimate relations with any woman, ever, in fear of him procreating."

The Canadian Government is not attempting to have any sex with anyone. The potheads of Canada are certainly not attempting to romance their weed, unless of course their addictions have taken on a sexy yet disturbing new turn. In any event, you can not use the term "cock-block" in reference to government policy. It's just plainly inaccurate.

Also, when you use sexual vernacular in your letters to your Member of Parliament, I throw it away.

I've been throwing away a lot of letters recently.