Expanding the definition of "standard" in relation to computer repair techniques

I tried to hook up my printer last night. Most people expect to get printed pages when they hook their printers up. I got a computer meltdown of Chernobyl-like proportions. Windows ate itself AND my computer started overheating. Every time I tried to reformat my computer and reinstall windows, my it would shut down from overheating halfway through the process. Clearly, this was going to test every ounce of my computer-repair knowledge to its limit.

Wait a minute, why don't I just put the computer in the fridge?

So, I cleaned out the top rack of the refrigerator, set windows to install, then slid the laptop in and went to watch TV. About fifteen minutes later I went back, pulled out a frosty laptop, switched CDs, and put it back in for the second half. Apparently it worked, because I'm writing this post on it.


Also, I'm tired of gay men hitting on me. If you're a gay man and reading this, then please don't flirt with me. First, you're not the first nor are you the hottest, so if it was going to happen it would have by now. Second, I am also a guy, so don't use the same techniques to pick me up that I've used to try and pick girls up. You are not as smooth as you think. I do know what you're up to.


I just got my tickets for Bluesfest! I'm gonna get stabbed at the Kanye show!!